That is the chant that's been going through my mind this week. It's the inner voice that is telling me that time is running out for real. This week, time has turned critical, and my inner voice is now so loud, I can no longer ignore it.
go, go, go!!
I walk through the hallways, to the greenhouse, up the driveway, in the parking lot. And every step my mind screams "go". The results of the experiments I'm setting up now will not come in time for the dissertation deadline. They are contingency experiments, in case the other ones don't turn out right. In case I can't make it on time for a December graduation. Time is really up. I can hardly believe it.
On the one hand, if I had worked at the rate I'm going now all along, I would have been finished a year ago. On the other hand, there is no way anyone can sustain this for any length of time. Every minute in the lab is spent near the greenhouse. Every one of my plant shelves will be filled to capacity after today. Every minute at home is spent either writing, or thinking about writing. It's this all-consuming drive that hopefully will provide the final push necessary. It will have to.
Anyway, enough time spent typing this blog post. It's been hard to take my raging mind away from work, but maybe it will refresh and reset me too. Another cup of coffee for the day, and the race continues. Hang on to your hats folks! The finish line is in sight.
Can someone explain this to me?
1 hour ago